The practice: recognition or mindfuness
“Not everything that is faced can be changed, but nothing can be changed until it is faced.” James Baldwin
Daily Reflection: Recognition or Mindfulness: what’s the difference? Understanding the difference between the two can be transformative. I often thought when I was able to consciously recognize whatever I was feeling in the moment, I was be mindful … charged by my anger… overwhelmed by doubt or fear…. belittled by shame and guilt… yeah, I am being mindful. And yes, recognition is the worthy and monumental first step, naming what we are feeling is no small thing. But at this point, it is helpful to check in with our attitude towards whatever we are experiencing because we can recognize what is happening in the moment but still be resistant to, being reactive or wanting to deny whatever it is we are experiencing.
The key ingredient that takes us from recognition to mindfulness is level of acceptance. With mindfulness, we are allowing the moment to be what it is, allowing our emotions, feelings and experiences to be without denying, excluding or fighting against. It doesn’t mean we are giving in or condoning what is happening but rather we are learning how to be with our experiences fully. And from this, we begin to see our problems are opportunities to learn and grow. We must first accept a situation before we can work with it and it all begins with the radical acceptance of our pain and difficulties. Audre Lorde reminds us, “Nothing I accept about myself can be used against me to diminish me. “
“I kept running away from my darkness until I understood that in it, I would find my freedom.” Yung Pueblo
Meditation Challenge: Mantras, also known as protection for the mind, are short phrases that can be quite helpful in meditation as a way of steadying our attention. When I am working with accepting some challenges or difficulties in my life, I often use two mantras. First is the phrase “this belongs too”. When we bring this perspective, this sense of acceptance to our difficulties, there is a layer of suffering that drops when we stop resisting what is happening. The second mantra is “it’s okay” which again is a way of balancing recognition with a genuine acceptance of what is happening. “It’s okay” to feel to feel what I am feeling, I can be with it. I often use “it’s okay” when I am having troubles falling asleep at night with a racing, overwhelmed mind. These mantras help shift our attention and energies.
Mantra can take on my different flavors and feeling tones. Thich Nhat Hahn offers numerous mantras for meditation and for life perspectives; for instance, “Breathing in I calm my body, breathing out I smile. Dwelling in the present moment, I know this is a wonderful moment.” So, I invite you to be creative, recognizing what you need and make your own as a way of steadying the mind.
“The basic principle of spiritual life is that our problems become the very place to discover wisdom and love.” Jack Kornfield