The practice: befriending yourself
“I learned a long time ago the wisest thing I can do is to be on my own side.” Maya Angelou
Daily Reflection: With mindfulness, it is said we are learning how to befriend the moment but more importantly learning to befriend ourselves, accepting and loving ourselves just as we are. So, the question becomes: can you be on your own side? Can you accept, befriend, and love yourself just as you are now? What would it be like to your own best friend? If you were to name all the things that you love, how long would it take you for you to include yourself? This is our courageous work.
“Your path is not to seek for love but merely to seek and find all the barriers within yourself that you have built against it… and embrace them.” Rumi
Meditation Challenge: Saving the best for second to last?!?! Loving Kindness Meditation aka Metta meditation has been one of the most grounding and healing meditations I have practiced. Metta meditation, a practice of warmth and friendliness, is a deep acknowledgement that our lives have something to do with one another; that we are in this together. With Metta meditation, we are sharing the best of our human nature with ourselves and with others, bringing forth benevolent qualities in our lives. The classic phrases that are silently repeated to help steady the mind are: May I be safe… May I be healthy… May I be happy… and may I live with ease; May you be safe… May you be healthy… May you be happy… and may you live with ease.
What I love most about Metta mediation is that it is a practice of creativity. You can replace the classic phrases with whatever you need in the moment, whatever your loved ones or the world needs: love, peace, hope, forgiveness, courage, clarity, acceptance, silliness, presence, etc. You can also send Metta to a variety of beings as the practice is meant to be inclusive and unobstructed. Try sending Metta to yourself, loved ones, family, friends, people who might be difficult for you, those who are being oppressed or marginalized, and all of humanity who are sharing this moment with together. Another creative variation of the practice is sending Metta to your own difficult emotions, feelings, and challenging experiences, holding it all with loving kindness. You can practice Metta sitting in traditional meditation, while you walk, driving or before you go to bed. And as you practice, please know that the words and phrases aren’t as important as the feeling tones you are creating in the body by focusing on the benevolent qualities of heart. We learn to quiet the mind so that we can tend to the heart, open the heart, bringing more compassion to ourselves and to the whole of humanity.
May you be safe and peaceful, may you be happy and free, may you meet your moments fully, seeing the beauty of life and may you be free from suffering and the causes of suffering.
**There are various Metta Meditations on my website under TOOLS... Guided Meditations if you are wanting more support with the different variations of Metta.
“Forgive yourself for what you did and said to yourself when you did not know how to love yourself.” -Yung Pueblo